Definition of JADED
1: fatigued by overwork : exhausted
2: made dull, apathetic, or cynical by experience or by surfeit
My friend and I went out for a bit last night and had some fun girly conversations. We also had some of those "truth moments" too. We were discussing why the two of us are no longer going to a morning mom group. It really turns out that we have become jaded by our experiences. Sitting in a group of young mothers, listening to their gripes about crying babies and temper tantrum children leave me feeling empty. Cause really, how do you compare that to a seven year old who tries to self-harm, a baby with a feeding tube, threats from birth parents, feces smeared on your wall, or all the other "non-normal" things children in foster care can come up with? It's very painful to hear the complaints about their children when I know that the children living with me can leave at the whims of the county and state. I have no rights to them. I would be as devastated losing them as they would be their birth child. I waited 7 years for them. I love them.
I'm jaded by parents of all sorts. I help out at my kiddos school. Certainly this this not required of ANY parent and certainly not a foster parent. I do it so I can observe my kiddos. I can see the truth in how they really are at school. Parents who want to believe that schools will let you know when their is a problem are often mistaken. If you are lucky, you may learn about something at a conference, but teachers sure don't go out of their way to communicate any issues.
Really, I'm done with so many other parents. My son's 1st grade teacher used to send home a study guide for his social studies test. It was wonderful because I could see what he was learning and help him prepare. Then some parents complained that it was "too much work" for little Johnie and then nothing came home. My son then started failing tests because he couldn't prepare. This year, I had to have a teacher email all the families stating that their AFTERNOON (not after lunch) recess was taken away from the entire class. The class had a 15 minute math lesson turn into 45 minutes. After several warnings the teacher took the recess away. Really? You had to email me? I sent a message back saying "You go girl! If you say your going to do, do it?" I don't understand why I needed an almost apologetic note about it. Seriously, if you don't hang strong she wouldn't have control over her classroom.
What are we teaching our children? If you parents whine hard enough that the teacher should change? How do you think that your kiddos will EVER respect their teachers? You just undermined that by agreeing that the teacher is harsh. Maybe I am the anti-parent. But I want my kiddos to have respect for their teacher. I want them to be prepared for class and life. I want them to be responsible and held accountable for their actions. I think it will make them much better adults.
As my friend writes:
"Right? We don't want our mechanic to change the oil on the car and leave the oil pan open because he didn't feel like grabbing that cover and putting it back on. We don't want the dentist to drill out the cavity and skip the filling. We don't want to order a Big Mac and get it to find they didn't feel like doing the burger piece.
So why are we letting our kids do 90% of the work and say good enough?" ~ http://networkedblogs.com/p1SGS
Do all things without grumbling or questioning, ~ Phillippians 2:14 (English Standard Version (©2001))
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