Today has been an interesting day for me. It was our first scheduled appearance for the TPR (Termination of Parental Rights) hearing. For me, it's a very exciting, emotional, and heart breaking thing.
It's exciting because it's the first step in being able to finally adopt the three children who have shared my home for over 2 years. I love them so much and would be honored to share the rest of my life with them and be able to love them as my children. It's all very humbling and thrilling. These children mean the world to me and I'd do anything for them.
It's emotional because I know that nothing is final until the judge makes a decision and even then, we have to wait for appeals to be finished. If there was some i or t not dotted or crossed, we could also be kicked out of TPR court and have to wait again.
It is also heartbreaking. Even though not much of a bond remains between the children and their mother, it is still their mother. The decision to terminate rights takes it permanent that they will not be going home. Although, I feel that their safety may be in question and also feel that their mother may still need to make some life changes, it's always their mother. They love her and I have to believe that in some way, she loves them. When the children are adopted, they lose their history, their family and other familiar things. I know that it will leave a permanent hole within them that I will never be able to exactly fill. We will simply be able to love them the best that we can.
So... back to today's story. It would be simpler if mom didn't show today. Things could move along in default without her say or contesting. But she did come today. I never truly understand why she comes or doesn't come. Perhaps showing up is her way of showing she still loves them. That she isn't ready to give in yet. She may or may not want to do everything the courts want her to, but she showed up when it really counted today. She was very quiet and didn't say a word to me.
We made it into the court room after waiting nearly 2 hours. There was some question as to what Peach's father's address was. So the court decided to get him on the phone right there and then. Lucky he answered. He gave the court the information. Then he asked if the judge was there. I tried my best to hold back a giggle as he had been talking with the judge the entire time on speaker phone. Then he said something truly remarkable. He knew they were sending TPR paperwork but he asked "can we settle this here and now?" He told the court that he wanted to voluntary terminate his rights to Peaches because he wants her to stay with us. He told the court that he believed she is doing well in our home and that my hubby and I are doing a great job with her.
I could hardly believe what I was hearing! I was shocked and amazed. I was overwhelmed by his appreciation for what we do for his daughter. I am raising his child. He could criticize us for any thing! Here, in front of the court he praised us! It was a very amazing moment.
So at the end of the day, these children have many parents who love them. One parent who trusts in us to take care of his daughter with the most loving care and respect. Another who will contest and still fight for their return home. Two more parents who will keep loving on them and providing a safe home as long as necessary.
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